05
Mar
10

Mounting the Everest

By Sanjay Jha Leave a Comment
Categories: Cricket

By Sanjay Jha

I was in nearby Dubai watching Janko Tipsaveric upset constant British-hope of renewal Andy Murray in the ATP Masters 500 tennis tournament when I received a text message from both a passionate cricket aficionado and the publisher of my forthcoming book. It was as concise and compact as the man it described, the little Master of epic dimensions, Sachin Tendulkar. At first, I ignored it, accustomed as one is to Tendulkar’s incredible flourishes (particularly in the light of his recent centuries scored with effortless ease) and continued watching an exhilarating display of brutal double handed back-hand down- the- line shots, which had Murray staring in utter disbelief at his fashionably-bespectacled Serbian rival even as two British women sitting right behind me muttered sighs of despair as they reluctantly came around to accepting that Andy would be soon headed for the land of fish and chips, earlier than planned perhaps. But it was my wife’s SMS that really stirred things up. Her engagement with cricket is as fragile as bone china vase resting on a Chihuahua’s tail, and she finds the concept of an LBW fairly superfluous and complex. So when I read a hurriedly scribbled message from her about Sachin’s record runs, I knew there was something mind-numbing that had happened. I think I sighted a blue moon in the Dubai night that evening.

Sometimes you wonder what makes the man that he is especially when he is considered to be in the December of his career. At age 37 almost, with more surgical interventions in his body than the others, what inspires such greatness that 200 runs flow against a formidable South African bowling attack in a miserly 147 balls? There is also a significant little nugget that we may have inadvertently overlooked. While carping cynics will point to the bald head of the Gwalior pitch, remember, this was supposed to be South Africa’s grudge game, a planned assault to avenge that Jaipur heart-stopper which denied them what could have been a humdinger of a win. It therefore makes Tendulkar’s belligerent counter-attack even more meaningful and not just a statistical marvel. The fiery battery of pace-bowlers of the Proteas, Dale Steyn, Wayne Pernell, Charles Langevedlt et al were supposed to tame the 17,000-run machine into meek submission, but what followed was a role reversal.

Now how does one explain this indescribable phase in Sachin’s already ornamental career, when most peaks have been majestically, almost insouciantly captured ? 13,447 Test runs, 17,598 ODI runs, record partnerships, 93 hundreds in both forms of the game and a daunting average! I think it has to do a lot with freedom. The freedom to be oneself. Beyond everyday scrutiny, minute assessments, relentless tracking, a constant whirl of being challenged on to another record. When you care, and yet you don’t. When winning is everything, and yet it isn’t. When a century is welcome, but big deal if otherwise. It is an internal emotion, a private sentiment that happens imperceptibly to those who attain greatness. Of course records matter, but runs matter more, because records are a mathematician’s googly for armchair discussions, for endless realms of newsprint. The 175 against Australia at Hyderabad last year was a manifestation of Tendulkar’s new-found unencumbered space, his latitude to excel knowing no magnitude. The same relaxed freedom with which Roger Federer dispatched a rejuvenated in-form Murray at the Australian Open. No point to prove, no new personal benchmarks to set. It is just that the natural impulse takes over. The rest is for us media guys to ruminate on. Argue about. And debate endlessly till the cows go to sleep.

In a way a tempestuous ghost of the past has been silently buried. In 1997 on a sultry, sweltering summer evening Saeed Anwar, the erstwhile Pakistan opening batsman had ruthlessly destroyed Indian bowlers scoring 194 runs in 146 balls as Pakistan triumphed despite a momentary Indian fight-back. In that match Sachin scored four runs and looked disconsolate and despondent as any skipper would feel after an emphatic defeat. To rub salt in India’s wounds it was India’s 50th year since 1947 and the title trophy was appropriately called Independence Cup. I recount Sachin’s sorrowful countenance and albeit I never saw the Gwalior princely execution the other day, I think it was divine justice that he achieved the unthinkable and broke the shackles of a 13-year-old nightmare.

Sachin has now played with almost two generations; Kris Srikanth his first captain is now a 50-year-old selector and he shares the dressing room with young Ishant Sharma, Virat Kohli and Ravinder Jadeja, and rookie teenagers of Mumbai Indians. It is this seamless adaptation, his enduring flexibility and lack of ego which makes him singular. As I had written earlier, somewhere deep down inside I don’t think he was prodigiously amused at being called the grand old granddad by an audacious Yuvraj Singh. In his case the spirit is willing, so is the flesh. He needs no external stimulation from the statistical minded who goad him to break Brian Lara’s 400-run record or score 50 centuries in Tests. His insatiable hunger for runs is a mysterious biological phenomenon and could be worthy of a Harvard Medical School research study as it defies that age-old doctrine of diminishing production with extended longevity. Sachin defies traditional laws of nature.

Comparisons are usually odious and the ones with Don Bradman are typically provincial and need to be earnestly dismissed. How can anyone contrast Rod Laver’s two same calendar year Grand Slams after a long hiatus in between with Roger Federer’s wondrous 16 career Grand Slams? Two players. Different generations. Unique formats. Distinctive shift in the game’s character. Even technology and equipment. Personally, I think Tendulkar shuns these exaggerated blandishments himself as he does those wily swinging deliveries tempting him to make a front-foot drive.

 He may have moved from his modest abode of Bandra East to a more swank and swish Bandra West, but he is still somewhere Ramakant Achrekar’s curly haired unassuming mild mannered obsessed student. A dutiful pupil, a learner of the game. Constantly shifting. Always on the look-out for an opportunity. Monitoring his opponents. Reading the field placements. Checking the score-board. Judging the run with his co-striker. But above all, he is a lover of the game.

For Tendulkar , tomorrow is just the beginning of a new love affair.

23
Feb
10

The ‘home truth’ about Kolkata

By Sanjay Jha Leave a Comment
Categories: Cricket
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MS Dhoni it seems perpetrated the most horrendous, barbaric and grizzly crime since August 15 1947 against his own beloved country when India mercilessly thumped South Africa in Eden Gardens, Kolkata to joyfully avenge it’s equally mortifying defeat in Nagpur in the first Test just a few days earlier. At the time of writing though, the Shiv Sena had not yet resorted to asking Dhoni for a public apology for the anti-national act of winning a Test match at home. But a quick synopsis of the emphatic victory first. 

It is indeed rare that a team that loses a Test match by an innings and 57 runs still ends up winning the Man of the Match award. Hashim Amla, the South African number three batsman must have had strange, difficult feelings after Morne Morkel was declared out LBW to the treacherous guile of Harbhajan Singh, furiously celebrating his much-awaited resuscitation after a brief hiatus. Amla’s predicament and heart-burn is understandable as he stood a lonely figure amidst collapsing pillars of the Proteas , accumulating into mountainous ruins. India won the second Test match by a massive margin thus leveling the short series 1-1 and tenaciously holding onto it’s newly acquired no 1 ICC ranking in Test cricket. Four centurions, effective bowling and inspired captaincy makes for a potent threat and a deadly force for any team. South Africa was no exception to the Indian assault. They caved in despite late rearguard resistance.

The Kolkata triumph has to be reviewed in it’s contextual relevance post-the brouhaha that was caused by the Nagpur rout . The continued injury of senior batsmen like Rahul Dravid and Yuvraj Singh certainly aggravated Dhoni’s woes. But more importantly the colossal damage caused to self-confidence and team morale after an unexpected white-wash could have been fairly debilitating even for those with a hard hide. The win is therefore worth it’s weight in gold biscuits. Also, India was up against a determined adversary. But even as the uncorking of champagne bottles seemed germane there were may chronic cynics who were already pouring unfiltered cold water over it. Big deal, they said.

An argument that several cricket analysts and deep-seated pundits often make with great relish since the time the dinosaurs chose extinction over George Bush Jr is that India continues to decimate opponents only at home. It is an endless monologue uttered with half-baked conviction , a peculiarly distorted theory but one which finds plenty of popular acceptance. It is of course true to a large extent , but I have a simple answer—-SO WHAT? Would they rather that we lose these matches at home? Will that satiate their craving for neutral , same -as -everywhere level-playing field environment whatever that is? By the way, wasn’t Dhoni’s request for a spinner-friendly wicket turned down by the Kolkata curators ,anyway?

Incidentally, can weather conditions, nature of soil and pitch behavior , heavy dew and blowing dust , slant of the sunshine, excess humidity, crowd conduct, the nature of balls causing reverse swing, even the sight-screen and playing hours be homogenized amongst cricket-playing nations? Would not cricket be a boring predictable fare if every venue offered you standardized fare, if at all that was possible ? Is it not the thrill of playing in different, diverse and even deceitful conditions which really tests the best and encompasses the beauty of the game? Would we have still not called Roger Federer the greatest ever for his mind-numbing acquisition of grand slams even if he had not won a solitary French Open, albeit the latter truly made it even more memorable ? Was not Steve Waugh all charged up to pulverize the Final Frontier because of it’s historical duplicitous inaccessibility to them over many decades? Diversity applies to all, and is not just India’s monkey.

By the way, did not the same Graeme Smith’s team send us howling after the hammering in the BCCI chief’s home-town only a week ago , right ? And Nagpur is in India, no?? And didn’t the final frontier finally crack, crumble and collapse against the Australians in 2004, , co-incidentally in Nagpur itself? While a victory abroad is certainly laudable, how is it really different from a hard-earned win or a casual walk-over at home?

If you have been following things other than the senseless IPL-related imbroglio which grabs sustained headlines from one meaningless controversy to another meaningful triviality, you will find that Australia has discourteously if not with altogether extreme vulgarity sent Pakistan and West Indies packing in death-defying hurry from the comfort of their familiar home-living room. Did not England win back-to-back Ashes series while having fried fish and chips in the good ole’English weather ? . Does that in any way diminish their superlative show?

Cricket analysts are recommended to kindly follow the Davis Cup tournament format to understand why Spain ( with Rafa Nadal , Fernanado Verdasco and David Ferrer) is unlikely to provide the USA (Andy Roddick, Sam Querry and John Isner) with fast hard-courts instead of it’s famous red clay at a home encounter. And vice versa. Why does Leander Paes always sport a sly grin when playing on green grass? When you call someone home for a meal do you check with the guests their preferred menu ? You know what, I don’t. And frankly, we always end up offering the same meal for our unsuspecting friends what we usually like ourselves the most. That is frankly the ” home truth”.

I think this “winning abroad” obsession is a mind-set issue. A win is a win, period! Will the Aussies ever make Perth into a deceptive deluding turner just because Harbhajan Singh might want to tease them with a tweak? Never ! Yet, against all bleak forecasts of preordained doom, we won there right ? Therefore if we feast on them like crunchy salad in our dust-bowls, so be it. It is quid pro quo. Frankly, it evens out. Just as much as we harangue our boys about winning abroad, shouldn’t the overseas teams be equally challenged to topple us on our turf? In fact, the best thing about playing in different conditions is that it compels global players to become adaptive to new environments even as they must preserve their stranglehold on domestic terrains. Each is as important as the other. I think it is about time we discarded the bad habit of attaching a premium to an overseas win , even as we discount our domestic reveling. It is a heads you win, tails I lose proposition.

There is an old Indian saying that apne ghar me chooha bhi sher hota hai (in one’s own home even the rat is like a lion). At least after the Kolkata win, India is ahead in the rat-race. At home!

12
Feb
10

HAMARA CONGRESS ASKS

By Sanjay Jha Leave a Comment
Categories: Politics
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1) Why did not Union Minister Sharad Pawar use his celebrated “ personal rapport and good relations” to ask Shiv Sena chief Balasaheb Thackeray to stop his party’s senseless agitation and mindless violence against Shah Rukh Khan’s film My Name is Khan when he met him to seek his “blessings” for his IPL tournament and allow the Australian players to participate ? After all, is not the law and order situation in Mumbai the responsibility of the NCP which is part of the Maharashtra coalition?

2) Uddhav Thackeray says the Shiv Shainiks are taking to the roads in a “ spontaneous reaction” but Manohar Joshi states that “ we will not allow the screening of the film MNIK till SRK apologises”. Spontaneous ? Or clearly deliberately provocative?

3) One particular TV editor kept asking SRK if his statement on Pak players was a “ publicity stunt”. But the same channel brazenly promoted the SRK interview a thousand times during the day. Bottomline; who really needed the “ publicity”, SRK or the channel itself? And why are channels still inviting Shiv Sena spokesmen to spew their venom instead of allowing for a rational discussion amongst saner elements ? Or is the prepared mayhem part of TRP strategy?

4) NDTV’s coverage of the SRK-SS conflict was the best, moderate, reasonable and mature and brought out the endearing human traits and inner strength of India’s superstar. Dr Prannoy Roy’s interaction with SRK-Karan Johar was indeed rich, dignified and had sheer class written all over it. But what of the others?

5) It was great to see Headlines Today’s anchor Rahul, the first TV anchor ( or maybe second to Nidhi Razdan of NDTV ) to have effectively put his namesake from the Shiv Sena in place. Now can the others learn their lessons fast enough ?

6) How come no one is asking about the conspicuous silence of the MNS? Let me give the media a story opportunity here , why do Shiv Sena and MNS hunt in an alternate pattern, one follows when the other finishes , when their targets and goals are the same?

10
Feb
10

INDIA : THE PARADOX WITHIN

By Sanjay Jha 1 Comment
Categories: Uncategorized

I have begun writing a book, partially planned and partly triggered by the bizarre events that have unfolded in Mumbai in recent times. Albeit one will try and do justice to the complex conundrum that is India—an unfathomable mystery beyond normal human sensibilities, I am prepared for the long haul. Over the last week we have had chaotic madness sweeping the city of Mumbai and leaving it’s millions of denizens fairly shell-shocked and feeling acutely embarrassed and highly agitated . Rahul Gandhi’s appropriate and valid observations on Indianness with reference to a united fight by Indian NSG commandoes against 26/11 terrorists met with an outlandish and downright abominable response from the Shiv Sena that had many heads reeling in mighty disbelief.

Shah Rukh Khan’s comments on IPL players from across the border has also unleashed a reprehensible unfortunate backlash from India’s famous parallel power center based out of Matoshree, Mumbai celebrated in cinematic form by legendary Amitabh Bachchan in a film called Sarkar which was termed a commercial success. It even flouted a sequel. In retrospect, you can understand why the grand old patriarch of the Thackeray family runs his own law school. A sense of false grandeur settles which is accentuated by years of pip-squeak , pusillanimous politicians at the helm . Soon, one genuinely believes that a quasi-centre of power is a legitimate logical corollary of social and political circumstances. The Shiv Sena and MNS , unlike us stereotype cynics and standard critics , actually genuinely believe that they have intrinsic relevance in our national life . This is also buttressed by the fact that they have scant respect for state leadership whom they believe to be equally circuitous. But the “Marathi manoos” is just a convenient ploy, part of the larger master-strategy of playing linguistic politics to espouse the divisive “ sons of the soil” theory. But more on that later. First, India’s dichotomous, asymmetrical, and peculiar ironies.

  1. India is the toast of Davos, Switzerland while back home in the commercial capital of Mumbai the very concept of one-India is being threatened. What a contradiction!
  2. If statements such as “ Mumbai is for all Indians” and “ India belongs to all” is breaking news , then can we imagine the abysmal levels to which our public standards have sunk? .
  3. How can the Shiv Sena and MNS morally demand that Australian and Pakistan players be banned when they are thrashing, humiliating and hurting their own fellow Indians in their OWN country ? Who is more anti-national, the Australian thugs or we ourselves? Have we ever considered that our own internal saber-rattling and physical assaults on each other may be actually encouraging disgruntled foreigners from treating our country-men with greater disrespect and condescension ? Isn’t India frankly the laughing stock of the world right now? There is an old saying that if your house is not in order, the world will exploit you —-ruthlessly. That is exactly what is happening today. In Australia. In Ireland. The virus may even spread.
  4. Can you imagine the insecurities, fears and nervousness of the common man in Mumbai when he hears of a local political party that threatens to prevent Rahul Gandhi from entering Mumbai when he represents both the national and state ruling party ? I thought that was the pinnacle of brazenness and the ultimate blatant disregard for law of the land? Some audacity that!
  5. How can the country allow a self-made decent hardworking man who is India’s unofficial global ambassador and the country’s reigning superstar to be threatened, attacked and bullied by a political party for making personal remarks on team selection for IPL ? It is the government’s responsibility to ensure a 100% secure environment for the release of Shah Rukh Khan’s film My Name is Khan this Friday February 12th 2010.
  6. The Indian media should know how to distinguish between those espousing hatred and those having a hard-line view. Instead of making every televised debate into an inaudible acrimonious exchange, they should stop inviting the predictable torchbearers of social violence in India into the studios. The democratic option of “ hearing the other side” has run it’s course. In fact, is there any need to debate on whether Mumbai is for all Indians? It is. It damn well is, my friend! Frankly, TV creates a debate where actually none exists.. It is asinine to hype “ Is Mumbai for all Indians? ” as if it is indeed a disputed subject worthy of intellectual stimulation ; this is where Indian electronic media exploits raging virulent discontent by creating a bigger conflagration from practically nothing. It is the Sena and MNS who end up having the last laugh. Think about it, Editors!
  7. The attack on the controversial ex-police chief Rathore , terribly regrettable as it was is a statement on the rising disillusionment and anger of the common man with India’s legal –justice system, police force, rampant corruption and a whole grocery list of grievances . One should note that the attacker was not even related to the victim; it is a sad and sorry tale even if he was supposedly unwell. India is currently looking a disturbed society , extremely stressed and essentially lonely.
  8. In the midst of all this Sharad Pawar, the next President of the International Cricket Council makes a visit to the residence of the Shiv Sena chief to offer an olive branch ostensibly to allow the Australian cricketers to play in the IPL. By the way, the Home Minister of Maharashtra is from his own party NCP. His visit, informal and friendly as it might have been based on personal equations, weakens the common man’s faith in institutional governance.

When I was in school I remember a chapter in social studies that explained the uniqueness of India; our unity in diversity. May be it is time some of our politicians went back to school.

10
Feb
10

FISH MARKET: MEDIA”S REALITY TV

By Sanjay Jha Leave a Comment
Categories: Media
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Arnab Goswami has started a new trend in broadcast journalism; a reality TV show of a fish market, a slugfest given to the highest decibels. If you saw his TV program on rising food prices on Times Now on January 14th 2010 featuring Brinda Karat , Ravi Shankar Prasad and Manish Tiwari , you would know what I mean. It was an astronomical flop-show. Ms Karat , as is the problem with several leftist spokespeople when speaking on aam aadmi issues , seemed unstoppable and after a point insufferable. Tiwari understandably retaliated with sufficient vigor, while Prasad prepared himself for a vitriolic assault. The paradox is that many news anchors live in a fool’s paradise that if they have guests squabbling like a bunch of soft-heads on a verbal laxative overdose they have hit the jackpot. Secretly, they believe they created real ripples, got the juices going et al. Utter garbage! They forget that their real audience switches channels rather quickly; the cycle is usually as follows, after the initial amusement at the silliness, there is heightened exasperation which culminates with a frustrated sigh. Switch! People rarely return to watch the parody. For Times Now this is now SOP. Firstly, Goswami invites heavy-weight guests. That too in fairly large numbers. Then he chooses to conveniently lose control; I have a sneaky feeling that his helpless loss of words is a deliberate tactic meant to make a viewer feel that Times Now really “ heats it up”. Not working Mr Goswami. It is as cold as a frozen turkey in a Polish subway .

On Face the Nation ( CNN-IBN) Sagarika Ghose landed up in a similar soup with Mani Shankar Aiyer and Lord Meghnad Desai, with Chandan Mitra for the third angle on the same old issue—Jawaharlal Nehru’s legacy , provoked by the media’s favorite whiplash boy Shashi Tharoor. . Aiyer tore viciously into the Lord’s flaky assessment of Nehru even as Mitra made some wobbly points of no relevance. But Mani surprisingly failed to make two crucial points in Nehru’s defense ; India’s first Prime Minister and one of the greatest statesmen the world has ever seen was a man who lived his active political life between two World Wars, when the concept of a big western empires still dominating large sections of the world was not unforeseeable and the risk of new power blocs creating a Third World war could not be ruled out either. India became independent even as war trials commenced and the whole world was still recovering from it’s devastating aftermath. It naturally impacted his entire political philosophy and approach to international relations. Nehru championed for regional and world peace post-1947 because he was convinced that if India led the Non –aligned movement and other peace initiatives with other smaller countries in their fold they would create a suitable buffer for reducing military conflict which actually neither India nor it’s trenchant neighbors could really afford given the massive challenge of human poverty they all faced , including Pakistan and China. The Indo-China War was more a tactical lapse in managing brewing tension as opposed to a strategic blunder. Nehru believed that after experiencing the horrors of western domination China itself would be more accommodating of it’s neighbors in matters which could be solved through mutual negotiations. That the Chinese aggressively pursued the military option is not a reflection on Nehru’s leadership but on China’s obsession with all things land that still surfaces sporadically even today.

Secondly, Mani could have categorically stated that instead of just pinpointing India one should look at how geopolitical relationships have changed so dramatically world-wide post the end of the Cold War, an inevitable aspect of evolution, change and progress. What is the big deal about India’s calibrated closeness to the USA in a unipolar world dominated by Washington ? Wasn’t Prime Minister Manmohan Singh being the first official state guest of Barack Obama at the White House a statement on India’s rising graph and it’s ability to suitably navigate with all the superpowers? Also now that McDonald’s has fought stroganoff for the Russian palate and soon there will be more Starbucks in China than in the US a manifestation of how economic equations now drive political relationships in a more mature free-trade globally integrated world the real big shift ? Aren’t we being antiquated in criticizing a foreign policy valid during it’s time of 1960s, naturally outdated with it’s passage. It is pragmatic politics. It has nothing at all to do with a dumping of the Nehruvian policy.

That Sagarika asked Mani for a public apology for making a personal dig at Desai was equally uncalled for , as there was nothing so unparliamentary or vilifying that Mani really said . Instead, for borrowing blatantly the title from Nehru’s masterpiece The Discovery of India and smartly calling his new book The Rediscovery of India perhaps Lord Meghnad Desai owes both Mani and the Congress an apology .

10
Feb
10

WHY DOES INDIAN MEDIA NOT LIKE SHASHI THAROOR?

By Sanjay Jha Leave a Comment
Categories: Media
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It started with a standard innocuous private decision of Congress MP Shashi Tharoor to stay in a five-star hotel pending the refurbishment of his allotted government bungalow. Suddenly all hell broke loose as if a dreaded terrorist had just sneaked into Central Hall of the Indian Parliament for a quick cappuccino. Besides being publicly chastised for his errant ways the man who almost became the Secretary General of the United Nations was thereafter followed with relentless energy especially in his now celebrated Twitter. Tharoor can rightfully claim an equity stake from Twitter promoters should India emerge as it’s new bastion as the MOS for External Affairs has done wonders for the brand.

Ever since the initial brouhaha Tharoor’s every tweet has been conveniently hyped, twisted and turned to give the erudite gentleman an image of being the Grand Old Party’s problem child. Tharoor’s repeated insistence that he was merely exciting a debate on his Twitter was met with circumspection if not cynicism. I think the general media believes that Tharoor is just seeking cheap publicity , so why not give it to him with a convoluted slant ? The Times of India’s front-page Sunday buffet and Monday’s continued platter reveals a chronically obsessed media that is clearly twiddling it’s thumbs “ majorly” – the latter being a particularly popular term with many from TOI albeit I am still to find it in either the Chambers or Oxford dictionary as of 11.58 am on January 11th 2010.

I think the Indian media has taken a selective near-animus against Tharoor because Tharoor is just not the conventional politician that you can happily quiz without doing your own homework properly. Politicians like Mani Shankar Aiyer ( he was brilliant in CNN-IBNs Devil’s Advocate swapping seats with Karan Thapar) , Kapil Sibal, Jairam Ramesh, Arun Jaitley, Abhishek Singhvi are invariably a constant pleasure to hear irrespective of whether you agree with them or otherwise. Tharoor brings with him the added flavors of being tongue-in-cheek, globally recognized, author of several books with interests ranging from Bollywood, cricket, culture, politics to international relations, internet savvy, articulate and always thinking out of the box irrespective of the consequent risks in the sensitive area of inner party protocol that he occasionally takes. Yet ironically, more than the Congress party it is our old fashioned media mind-set that finds Tharoor an iconoclast. I wonder if he gives some of our stalwarts an inferiority complex?

Perhaps the fact that Tharoor also has a dapper personality and a charming presence also hurts.

Time(s) to grow up a wee bit!

10
Feb
10

BIG IDIOTS!

By Sanjay Jha Leave a Comment
Categories: Bollywood
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Hi, but was on a much needed vacation hence the long hiatus.

New Year’s began with characteristic color; Vidhu Vinod Chopra , producer of 3 Idiots slamming the media by telling them to stuff it when the latter questioned him on the controversial issue of credits for author Chetan Bhagat. As bedlam broke out, Aamir Khan restrained the irascible Chopra from giving a further demo of his inflammatory temper, while Raju Hirani put on the veneer of Gandhigiri to restore order. But probably Chopra, Khan and Hirani should have gone back to their own scene from the film when Sharman Joshi squeezes out a toothpaste and tells Madhavan to try and put that back in the tube , words once spoken cannot be taken back. Bhagat wasted no time in hitting back with a square punch on the jaw and before long the whole world knew that all was far from well. So let us cut the long chase and summarize in brief , firstly, the two main characters in this petty conflict and then more.

Chetan Bhagat obviously on Cloud 9 after his first pop-fiction book Five Point Someone became an apparent bestseller , was probably too carried away when Raju Hirani, celebrated director of the classic Munnabhai series expressed interest in his work. My feeling is that Chetan, a good old yuppie, was clearly overwhelmed by that event and began visualizing an instant enhancement in his author “ valuations” and a new-found Page 3 celebrity image to really sensibly negotiate commercial terms on a pragmatic basis. Why on earth did he sell full copyrights for a measly Rs 1 lakh is the missing link that no one has looked into with adequate depth, though Bhagat has confessed that Chopra virtually frightened him into meek surrender. Either way, bottomline is that Bhagat sold cheap for obviously other perceived benefits. Frankly, it did get him columnist space and a lot of free media visibility.

I rate Vinod Chopra as one of India’s finest directors ever; Parinda was a masterpiece of unmatched proportions, and his Khamosh is one of the cleverest whodunits I have ever seen in Indian cinema. And albeit many critics trashed Mission Kashmir, I still rate Sanjay Dutt’s portrayal of a broken-hearted cop seeking redemption as one of his best. Then why do most find the genius Chopra insufferable? The answer is simple— he is now more a money-guzzling shark-like producer than a creative story-teller.

Chopra is clearly made fortunes, and in a fickle as flame industry the maxim is hard-line; the mightier party wins, there is no negotiation with the weak. After a point, success does not just get into your head , it also gets into your bottoms, it’s a systemic spread. Chopra’s hubris in throwing peanuts at an intimidated Bhagat manifests Bollywood’s power-play with naïve outsiders. This time it has boomeranged.

In short, it is the same old story; while Chopra quotes the work contract verbatim on his website, Bhagat talks about the spirit of it’s implementation. There is life beyond a lawyer’s lavishness.

Technically, Chopra is right BUT only up to a point. Bhagat has got paid as per agreed terms and his name featured in the rolling credits as was explicitly stated. So far so good. But Bhagat’s grouse is that while he was earlier given the false impression that 3 Idiots was just an inspirational take-off on the book , the truth is that the box-office monster of a film is in fact a “faithful adaptation” of the book , according to those who have read it. But once rights are sold , it is the producer’s prerogative what he does with it, right? .

The crucial aspect is; did Bhagat get an approved copy of the script ? If he did, Bhagat can go fly a kite in IIM, Bangalore. But did Chopra get Bhagat’s acquiescence recorded if it indeed was made available to him ? If not ( as seems the case) , he is not as tight in contract execution as is being speculated. So is somebody lying? I think the categorical answer is YES. Either way, Chopra is adequately covered by the contract since Bhagat failed to ensure it’s inclusion. Legally, therefore Bhagat is standing on a banana peel in a quick-sand.

Thus, I believe the trigger point that made Bhagat into a Bhagat Singh was the rather disparaging manner in which the 3 Idiots team kept insinuating that the screenplay was a mere 2-5% of the book content because, honestly , that was a darned lie. For any author , good, bad or ugly the copyright is his soul. Bhagat is actually reacting today to perhaps his earlier mortification at being condescendingly coerced into selling cheap and the repulsive relegation of his work . It is his repressed angst erupting like a volcano, and something else.

Neither Chopra ,Bhagat nor trade pundits in their wildest dreams expected 3 Idiots to become such a huge money-spinner . The stakes have altered completely overnight. Bhagat is expectedly morose at the missed opportunity of profuse fame; the season of highly televised film awards which will commence shortly wherein he could have been the cynosure of all eyes, the Prasoon Joshi- kind –of- intellectual breed, a new poster boy of Bollywood. That is why the sudden rush for “ Story” credits. Ideally, he should have covered that flank in his written contract. But he has every right to even now belatedly challenge a blatant misrepresentation by the 3 Idiots camp. He has a right to fame, celebrity-hood, money, power et al that he now so stubbornly pursues. He is deftly exploiting “ grey areas “ as legally he has a lost case.

Chopra, Hirani and Khan have displayed a typical ruthless , contumelious Bollywood streak, they methodically trample the susceptible weaker-party. But this time they were dealing with a smart young man seeking justly his moment in the sun who could match a sarcastic sound byte with an equally sardonic one. It is a fair and square battle.

Chopra should ideally incorporate Bhagat amongst the title-holders for “ story” credits (along with Joshi and Hirani) . They can then walk on the stage together, sing each other’s praises till we blush crimson, all three ( idiots?) suitably compensated and send the appropriate filmy message—all is well!

PS: The pussy cat gingerly came out of the bag in this entire acrimonious drama . Our man Aamir Khan is truly not the Mr Perfectionist he claims to be . Firstly , he never really read the book on which his film and script was based . Sacrilege indeed! And secondly, Mr Khan actually chided media for asking questions without reading Bhagat’s fiction when he himself was guilty of the same. But after Rs 100 crores and counting, I guess all is finally well !

Happy New Year!

10
Feb
10

THE BUCK NEVER STOPS WITH TIGER

By Sanjay Jha Leave a Comment
Categories: Politics
Tags:

The last week has been a never-ending barrage of controversial news; Telangana, David Headley, Copenhagen and climate change , liberally interspersed with the sexual marathons of Tiger Woods’s putts , butts and long drives, and of course, cricket. With news coverage becoming increasingly commodity-like amidst this constant jamboree , certain features stood out.

I thought Barkha Dutt’s quick-fire interview with KSR from TRS established beyond doubt that the Congress made a political miscalculation in giving the sharp fellow an early VRS. It has created an absolutely unthinkable chaos in Andhra Pradesh, totally inconceivable till just a while ago when YSR was AKR ( Andhra ka Raja). Full credit to Abhishek Manu Singhvi and Manish Tiwari of the Congress for a valiant effort at sustainability even as the odds mounted with every passing faux pas.

I think Union Environment Minister Jairam Ramesh is one of our most erudite, articulate and market-friendly politicians with an acidic wit and biting sarcasm. It is good to have a savvy negotiator who knows his onions and potatoes as India’s representative at Copenhagen. It made for amusing viewing , however, as Jairam walked the red-carpet being serenaded by TV microphones on both sides , yet speaking with remarkable equanimity and choosing carefully crafted language to avoid skirting another controversy. The Ayatollah will be pleased.

CNN-IBN has managed to make it’s 9 pm bulletin fairly well-paced with multiple news in proportionate distribution to the importance of the event. It works although with due respects to Rajdeep Sardesai’s regular co-hosts , it is a program that Sardesai is better equipped to make a signature program solo. Unlike Arnab Goswami of Times Now who hogs the complete program with his telltale bulldozing , Rajdeep for all his fire and brimstone is an accommodating senior partner to his visibly impressed colleagues.

The Haagen-Dazs ice-cream ad campaign manifests the chronic bug that bites all “ creative types” ; let’s be different. Frankly, the “ international passport holders” line is neither stimulating, funny nor wacky, it is unalloyed rubbish for which the multinational giant must have paid a whopping sum after midnight-oil burning brainstorming (?) sessions. They have been correctly chastised. First round to apna Amul and vegetarian Baskin Robbins! Maybe American businessmen need to learn from the mistakes of their noble counterparts like KFC, for example, who blundered their way into Indian sensibilities. Both the creative team and General Mills who approved the infantile text have chocolate chip with mint on their faces.

Which brings me to the ridiculous installment of titillating details on the sexual excesses, pun intended, of the most famous face of golf, Tiger Woods. Woods has no skeletons in the cupboards, he has them in abundant flesh in hour glass figures of varying age-groups. Since sex sells 24×7×365 we had Headlines Today promoting it as a tacky Whimpering Tiger and Crouching Dragons ( with silhouettes of skimpy women resembling Sherlyn Chopra look-alikes) . It was not just grossly exaggerated but pointedly stupid; just what does Wood’s manic obsession for just-in-time-demand for instant gratification have to do with an average Indian whose life is stretched daily to merely eke a survival? Just why do Indian TV channels blindly follow the US media has me flummoxed. I can imagine Headlines Today coming up with some pedestrian golf joke when the 18th woman surfaces with her nocturnal tale. Expect the worst.

Anyway, they say that golf and sex are the only two things that you can enjoy without being good at either of them. Clearly from the salacious sound bytes from his grocery-list of surreptitious conquests and 14 Grand Slam titles, Woods was good at both of them. But it is about time we left the legendary master of the green grass alone in his trying moments of self-discovery. Letting people be is part of responsible journalism.

10
Feb
10

WHO LEAKED THE LIBERHAN REPORT ?

By Sanjay Jha 1 Comment
Categories: Politics
Tags:

Has it ever struck you, common man, that we in India have stopped questioning some very basic issues which should occur to us with logical and biological precision on auto mode? Let me explain:

1) We all know that the Liberhan Report on Ayodhya demolition was leaked to the Indian Express and NDTV who naturally expectedly propagated the same with kinetic vigour. Shouldn’t the government, parliament , media, opposition parties, public etc find out who actually did it? Where? Why? When? What for? Why not the HT, Dainik Bhaskar or TOI? Why not CNN-IBN , Aaj Tak or Times Now? Who benefited by the planned expose ? What was the real motive? How can one pretend to be callously indifferent on an issue that has since resulted in unprecedented disruption of parliamentary proceedings post-leak ?

The Indian Express , in fact, categorically stated that it was “Home Ministry sources”. If so, they do know who was the surreptitious bureaucrat. Did it have the Home Minister’s blessings? Were various parties working in coherence?

In fact, all it takes is a subpoena from the court to get to the bottom of the fact. But who is going to bell the cat?
I think the “ leak” deserves a serious investigation as it is fast becoming standard operating procedure in our country.
Even the Ram Pradhan report on 26/11 has been allegedly “ leaked”. Why ? Are there deals between certain media houses and the purported conspirators? Does anyone care to find out? Till today we have no idea about what really transpired in the cash-for-votes scam in parliament where the BJP was rumoredly hand-in-glove with CNN-IBN; I think the public has a right to that disclosure. RTI anyone? PIL maybe?

2) All the TV channels , in particular, have failed to focus on the key element of the entire debate ; why is the ATR so remarkably insipid ? I hope the Congress is not relying on some old-fogy advice that by taking serious action in the ATR it will bring Ayodhya center-stage and give BJP an electoral plank on a silver platter to queer the pitch in the upcoming UP assembly elections and may be even 2014. It may be a fallacious assumption and a glaring lapse ; remember the raison d’etre of BJPs existence is the Ayodhya temple objective anyway. The BJP will continue to raise the temple issue at sporadic intervals to keep it’s vote-bank in a tight grasp and to accumulate sundry disaffected elements in its fold on the emotive issue. In fact, I believe that by allowing the ATR to look so squeamish the Congress has allowed the BJP to ridicule the Liberhan Report, and worse, focus all the damaging repercussions on to their own PV Narasimha Rao. I was astonished to see Salman Khurshid painstakingly state that Atal Behari Vajpayee is not “technically indicted” by the Report. That was Chandan Mitra’s job and not his. Worse, the BJP public relations machinery found a bonanza to whip in the over-the-top Beni Prasad Verma. Look at the consequent irony; the highlight of the parliamentary debate which should have been the universal condemnation of the Sangh Parivar and the BJP for the disruptive Babri demolition instead had India’s Prime Minister apologizing to the BJP for the indiscretions of a Congress MP. In simple terms, we have seen a catastrophic collapse of the Congress in failing to check-mate the BJP for it’s blatant disregard of India’s secular character.

3) On Telengana, frankly, the Congress has blown away a tactical political opportunity to seize initiative by being characteristically reactive . Frankly, the writing was always on the wall since 2004 when it was publicly stated by the Congress-TRS ( who fought the elections together ) that they supported the formation of Telangana state. By allowing one man’s fast unto death to catapult the government to it’s knees so dramatically reflects poorly on our great Indian democracy no matter how legitimate the demand. Once gain, Congress continues to lose extraordinary ground on account of it’s abysmal low-levels of pro-activity.

It must be getting chilly cold in Delhi for Congress spokespeople at the moment.

10
Feb
10

THE BUCK STOPS WITH VAJPAYEE

By Sanjay Jha Leave a Comment
Categories: Media
Tags:

( In defense of Lieberhan Report )

I am focusing this piece on what seems to have become recently the central controversial issue of the Justice Lieberhan Report on the Babri Masjid demolition at Ayodhya in 1992 ( courtesy BJP media cell’s skilful handling and the Congress’s surprising pussy-footing strategy on the subject ) —- former Prime Minister Atal Behari Vajpayee’s indictment and being held equally guilty as others in saffron colors in that illustrious congregation , which unfortunately obfuscates the major principal finding—- BJP and the Sangh Parivar’s daylight flouting of civil procedures and proven criminal misconduct for settling disputes in a matter of humongous national sensitivity.

Frankly, I think we are completely overdoing this sanctimonious bit about Vajpayee’s indictment by the rightfully much maligned for it’s almost- posthumous- appearance Justice Lieberhan Report. In fact, I have been quite flabbergasted with my good old friends in the Congress party ( Salman Khurshid appearing almost unnecessarily apologetic about it ) completely missing the vital point of what Lieberhan is explicitly stating : the buck stops at the top, period ! As it should. It happens in all walks of life; sports, business , adventure trails, voyages , everywhere— the captain of the ship stands up in honorable duty to accept consequences for his team’s inadequacies or violations. In fact, it applies more stringently in politics perhaps than anywhere else. President Harry Truman, anyone? This is the germane issue, not the technical error of not being given a suitable “ notice”. That is nothing but bunkum.

Vajpayee was the supreme leader of the BJP and in a matter of such enormous gravity how can the numero uno simply wash his hands away and walk away scot-free? It is actually as simple as that. It is akin , in fact, to LK Advani’s preposterous statement on his supposed ignorance of the hostage drama during the Kandahar hijacking. The bottomline is Vajpayee either deliberately slept through the insane demolition , conveniently looked away or was too intimidated to take on his fiery colleagues. Either way he is a silent accessory , an established conspirator to the sacrilege that followed. I think all these private drawing room quotes about his supposed anguish is utter balderdash; why didn’t he resign from the BJP is protest against such a blasphemous act ? It again sounds like Advani’s “ saddest day of his life” claptrap. If we castigate Lieberhan for flimsy technical errors, then how can we on the other hand give credence to personal ex-pressions of clearly fabricated angst heard by party colleagues and some media-men in close proximity?

The BJP are past-masters at diabolical double speak and can manipulate statements with insouciant confidence ; note Vajpayee’s passionate outbursts on video clips where he used his masterful oratory to outstanding provocation. . He was not called a mask by his own party stalwart Govindacharya for nothing. My case rests: Vajpayee is clearly and certainly guilty of willful inaction and of adroitly passing the buck. Let me give you further corroborative evidence.

If you need proof ask yourselves where was this supreme leader when Gujarat burnt in Y 2002; was he not the Prime Minister leading a billion people of India ? And unlike PV Narasimha Rao who was at least dealing with a dubious opposition party Chief Minister with pre-mediated designs in Kalyan Singh , it was Vajpayee’s own party-man Narendra Modi who was orchestrating a deadly carnage. Once again Vajpayee remained extraordinarily quiet for a considerable period; then suddenly in quintessential Vajpayee style , after incalculable damage was done he made a grand entry and cried copious tears. Trust me, no one believed him. In fact, you do not have to be a discerning political analyst to assess Vajpayee’s trademark style of functioning; he always ran with the hare and hunted with the hounds.

Now come on, guys, I think the BJP is a party which is so rehearsed in theatrical street-side entertainment you cannot take them seriously. Gujarat like Ayodhya was once again described as a “ spontaneous reaction”. The party has stock –phrases ready for public consumption on the condescending assumption that we are all gullible fools. Talk of hubris!

I think the BJP is hurting bad because Lieberhan has brilliantly boomeranged them by calling Atal Ji— “ the pseudo-moderate ”. He has hit the bull’s eye by paying them back in their own coin , and exposed Vajpayee for what he truly is. Just because the latter is now out of public life does not mean that we have to appear skewed in evaluating his distinct and cataclysmic failures.

The RSS and the BJP have no regrets whatsoever about the Babri demolition, a BJP CM was held guilty of contempt of court by the Supreme Court none the less, and even today they are not willing to categorically state that they will abide by a dispassionate neutral Supreme court-verdict. The fact that the Ayodhya destruction fractured India permanently and sowed seeds of Islamic extremism culminating right up to 26/11 is something that neither Vajpayee, Advani, BJP or the Sangh Parivar can ever disown. We have all paid a colossal price for their shenanigans. The BJP has always promoted it’s rabble-rouser poster-boys like Kalyan Singh, Narendra Modi and Varun Gandhi flagrantly in our faces. It smacks of a pathological disregard for dialogue, discussion and debate to resolve issues. In the circumstances, a technical error and Rs 8 crore expenses incurred by Lieberhan over 17 years looks like trivial change.

In fact, Lieberhan has just disproved the popular legal phrase that justice delayed is justice denied. Justice delayed , in the case of Ayodhya, still remains justice delivered.

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Sanjay Jha on Twitter

  • Mrs Gandhi spoke to most TV channels on the women's reservation bill; yet everyone is claiming an EXCLUSIVE. When will media grow up? 3 hours ago
  • after a swim one starves for food. watching news and eating not recoomnded tho. 16 hours ago
  • the womens bill should have been tabled later. maoists, telangana and terrorism is priority. and price rise. 19 hours ago
  • @BDUTT Barkha, the ideal solution is 20:20 20% reservation for 20 years only. In that time emancipation MUST happen. Has to be time-bound. 1 day ago
  • @iamsrk The tragedy is we will get Rabri Devi type rubber stamp women promoted by failed rich money-soaked political warlords as future MPs. 1 day ago

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